A Powerful Tip for Unowned Submissives

prettylittlelo:

It’s hard,
isn’t it? Being an unowned sub, with no one to submit to (at least not lifestyle-wise). But that’s ok, I understand, for I am also currently unowned. We,
subs, are usually very dependent beings, especially littles (like me!), and to
not have a Dominant to guide you and take care of you can be a little
unsettling at times. For those of us who have been previously collared, it may
be extra difficult to keep on taking care of ourselves without a set of rules
and punishments to keep us in track, and that’s ok, after all, it became a
habit.

But what is
not okay is to let it affect your mental, emotional and especially physical
health.
That’s why I came out with a motto that helps me a lot during those
ocasional blues and I hope that will help you too: “I am my own Master. Before
submiting to anyone, I submit to myself.”

Now what
does that mean? By stating that you are your own Master (or Mistress, Dominant, whatever floats your boat), you are telling yourself that you have
control over your situation
. You are submitting to yourself. At the same time you’re owning the power,
you are also giving it away.
 It’s a great feeling that can at least compensate a tad for that loss of constant power exchange.

And since
you are now your own Owner, you must make a rule list for yourself, and commit
yourself to following it. If you wish to, you can also add punishments for when
you break the rules. Did your previous Owner (or ideal Owner, if you never had
one) take care of your exercise routine? Or perhaps kept you in a healthy diet?
Great! Then keep going on that track. Feel motivated to please your Master
(which is now yourself)
. By doing this you not only connect with your inner
self, but also improve your self-esteem. After all, we all are, technically,
slaves to ourselves. Hence, you might as well enjoy your time in captivity!

Build
reward systems too – no cheating though, be honest above all things.
Spend time with your friends, and if you have none, go make some! I know it is
easier to say than to do, but think about what would please your Owner. “Would my
Owner be pleased if I were procrastinating and leaving behind all this work to
do?” “Would my Owner want me to overwork myself and be stressed and anxious?” –
go on thinking and adapting these phrases to your needs.

In the end
of the day, you still belong to yourself, and you don’t need a strong hand on
the other end of your leash to stay healthy, happy and positive
. And a bonus:
think that you are also improving yourself for your future Dominant, and they
would most definitely be extra pleased to find such a wonderful submissive like
you ♥ 

– xoxo,

Pretty
Little Lo

Be this awesome! As @empoweredsubmissive says, “Submission is not the easy way out of adulting. Not even close.” And you can’t give away what you don’t own.

Yeah, there are guys out there who want helplessly dependent 50’s style housewives that they can lord it over and maybe smack around every now and then… but they’re not, um, Doms!

There are guys out there who want to rescue hot messes and coax and/or whip them into shape. They’re not Daddies. More like codependents looking for a qualifier.

Nobody says you gave to be a serene ninja before you can Submit. Or Dominate for that matter! We’re all only human after all.

But as Pretty Little Lo says so clearly, basically, is you can’t give away what you don’t own.

The corollary for Doms and Daddies, which Pretty Little Lo should also get credit for, is you can’t own what you yourself don’t have: discipline yourself first.