Bdsm reminder

subbieblackgrl:

I’ve said the following many times before in my time on tumblr, but it always helps to remind folks:

There is no one-size-fits-all relationship in this lifestyle.

There are male subs, female dommes, those who switch, and those who come in all kinds of genders and orientations.

There are submissives that like pain, those who hate it, those who like it occasionally and those who make it a hard limit.

There are Doms who don’t spank, don’t yell, like being called by their names and like to cuddle their submissives. There are those who enjoy smacking, biting and spanking their submissives.

There are couples who leave bdsm for the bedroom, those who incorporate it in everything they do and some who are public about their lifestyle and those who are very private.

There are couples with kids and those without. There are submissives who work outside the home and Doms who aren’t in management positions or have never worn a suit.

There are submissives and Doms who hate rough sex. There are Doms who like when their submissive initiates sex. There are submissives who don’t have anal sex and Doms who enjoy kissing and lovemaking…

…and everything around and in between.

I get so many questions about what is “right or wrong” to do in a D/s relationship…when the only rule necessary is that *one person has the power and the other gives it up.* Whatever way you express that is nobody’s business but your own. You have needs and wants based on who you are…and you never have to explain that to people anyone. Do what works for you and yours.

I’m so tired of this elitist, “it’s only right if you do it this way,” mentality. Life is too short for that.

I’m sure I’ve posted this before.  If so I haven’t reposted it often enough.  

“Daddy” doesn’t mean older man.  Some Daddies are neither old nor men. “Little” doesn’t mean younger woman.  Many Littles are neither young nor women.  Dom sure as hell doesn’t mean “dominant man.”  Nor is Sub in any way the exclusive domain of women.