Good time of day Sir! My friend once told me, that no warm blooded men would say “no” to sex, unless there is a health issue or another woman. Talking about a man, woman in a relationship with. Would you agree with that? Thanks!


Not at all. The more mature I get, the pickier I get. I don’t fuck warm meat. I have an intimate encounter with a human being. I need to attracted to AND find that human being interesting and be connected to some extent otherwise I’m not interested.

Oh my fucking god!  Who was the friend?  Mike HuckabeeDonald TrumpAnthony Weiner?  Mark Foley?  There’s nothing wrong with saying “yes” to sex if you actually want sex.  With whoever you want to have it with.  Even wild, orgy-in-a-darkened-room sex.  (Though condoms would be, um, highly recommended.)

But fuck that “no warm-blooded men would say ‘no’” business!

It’s as insane as someone saying. “no warm-blooded woman would say ‘yes’ to sex!”

That’s not to say no one ever says either of those things.  Plenty of major fucking assholes say both those things – it’s basically a bedrock of right-wing “conservative” philosophy in the U.S!  

It’s just stupid and wrong.

Men aren’t powerless, they just think they are.  Never saying no is one of the best ways to stay powerless.

Saying no, even once, teaches you that sex doesn’t “make you a man.”  It doesn’t “validate” you.  It doesn’t make you “alpha.”  (Ahaha, is there anything more pathetic than thinking compulsive sex makes you more “alpha?”  Ahahahah!)

It’s not just bullshit, it’s dire bullshit.  Demeaning and degrading bullshit.

It’s what I was taught as a boy growing up.  I had no idea at the time that the older, male “role models” (who literally said things like “grab em by the pussy” no less!) were themselves pathetic, anxious, insecure, and way too often unsure of their own sexuality.

Whether you’re a man or a woman, sex when you want it, with someone you want to have it with, is awesome!  And whether you’re a man or a woman, sex when you don’t want it, or with someone you don’t want to have it with, is gross, corrosive, and pathetic.  

To recap: learning to say “no” after a lifetime of being told to always say yes can be amazingly empowering, just like learning to say “yes” after a lifetime of being told to always say no.