Hello i just wonder if you can tell how to say if a male is a sub. He do what i ask for likes to ask for my permission and depends on my decisions a lot. Im his “Queen”but when it comes to carving my attention he gets really mad and upset when he gets less than he needs. He can even be pouting and making me going crazy from jealousy because of it. Its satisfying but i dont know if this dominating brave characteristic makes him less sub? What are the signs a man is sub?
He does sound like a sub, but one who feels that his needs aren’t fully being met. Hence the pouting and acting out. A calm meta talk is in order, to get him to articulate his needs and expectations rationally so you can assess whether you are willing to meet them. Nothing wrong with saying “No, you need more attention than I am capable of giving.” At which point you work out compromises like adults or you decide you’re not a good fit. But the acting out and sulking has to stop
Awesome example of the point that Submission is it’s own, independent kink.
That said, kinks are all about consent and boundaries. Sounds like the possible Sub hasn’t gotten consent from the Anon. Who may need to decide if they want to be a Dom for them!
Obviously this isn’t a gender thing. It’s pretty common for women Subs to do the same thing. Including getting really nettled at their partners for not “taking them in hand.”
Consent matters for topping too! Especially if you’re feeling pressured to take on a Sub, be a Caregiver for a Little, etc.
