I have ben lying to my Dom these months with the food part when he ask me what am i eating i show (photo) him my friends food bc most of the time i skip. I know it’s wrong but i want to lose weight in a fast way so i usually dont eat all day or i only drink something and I want to tell him but am afraid that he will break up with me. If you were him what will you do? Sorry if it’s offensive.




Oh dear. Oh dear oh dear. This is bad. Let’s see …..

1. Your approach to weight loss is unhealthy at best.

2. You lied to your Dom, willfully and ongoing.

3. You topped from the bottom by circumventing your Dom’s rules.

Yeah, this is really, really bad. If I were him what would I do? I don’t know for sure. Fire you, most likely.

My two cents …

You’re setting yourself up for failure!

The only “diet” that works is the one you can live with forever.

If you feel the need to lie about food, you have “disordered eating” and possibly, an eating disorder.

Moreover, your lies are creating shame – just one more thing to “fix” with food!

Dear @instructor144 @anon , please seek a kink aware therapist. I can’t answer about your Dom, but you are using food as suicide on the installment plan ….


We can all be different selves with different people in small ways. But not in big ones. It’s not even about the lying part, it’s about the workability part. Lying like that isn’t workable. It’s just not. Not with your partner, who’s agreed to take one the responsibility and vulnerability of being capital-D Dominant with you. It’s not workable for YOU!

Because you’re not just lying to him, are you? You’re lying to your friends. To your therapists and other healthcare providers. To yourself too.

Sounds like your Dom has committed to working to help you live up to goals the two of you have negotiated together. If he’s trying to get you to a healthy weight, and into healthy habits it’s cause he cares about you. Maybe more than you care about yourself.

People sometimes focus too much on the dynamics of Dominance and Submission at the expense of PARTNERSHIP! You don’t want to confuse defying or “pleasing” your Dom with screwing your partner.

And your relationship.

It’s not about being a “good” Sub or a “bad” one. It’s about honoring your relationship.