I messaged your inbox and you reposted some very educational material, but my wife and I are new to this and we have read a lot. This is what my wife gets from the stuff she has red so far: It’s very contradictory- I’m trying to understand one thing reads like I’m just a fuck doll waiting for you to tell me what to do – the next says I have all the power and stuff like that.

nihilismpastry:

instructor144:

I’m not sure what the question is here?

A sub DOES have all the power, but if they want, they’re also a fuckdoll. They’re a fuckdoll BECAUSE they make certain lines in the sand, and the Dom/me must make sure they never cross those lines. 

See?

I can’t speak for D/S in particular, but in general power-exchange play the bottom has power, but they give it to the top.  The bottom can always take it back by using a safeword or just not consenting to play in the first place.  But unless or until they take it back then it… and the bottom… are the top’s to use.