I need to be trained but my Daddy won’t. He doesn’t ever follow through with punishment. Anytime I start being bratty he gives up and starts playing video games.




Ignoring you is a pretty good punishment as well ????

No it isn’t..? She’s misbehaving because she needs attention in the form of physical punishment. Ignoring her is clearly just stressing her out and making her feel like something’s wrong.

i see a problem with both of these.

first, ignoring your submissive is straight-up emotional abuse, as a punishment or otherwise. knock that shit off or recognize you’re an asshole dom who shouldn’t be anywhere near taking responsibility for a sub.

second, misbehaving in order to get attention is Manipulation 101. unless this was a strictly agreed upon part of play in the dynamic of the partnership (which isn’t personally my bag, but i’m not dd/lg or into bratting, so i’m giving it some leeway here if that is the case), and it doesn’t sound like it was based on the stress the Anon is describing, then Anon needs to use her words and communicate what she needs. 

(#meta talk time)

@danipup ‘s answer makes me so happy!  D/Lg is a kink for grownups.  (If it’s not between grownups then it’s not a kink it’s a crime, right? Right!)

Because it’s between grownups it’s always ok to have a goddamn grown-up conversation about what’s going on.  Here are some possible (if very starchy) scripts to try out.

“Jim, I’d like to have a quick check-in about how I can best signal that I want a training event.  Often when I need training and punishment you give up and play video games.  I feel ignored by you as my Daddy and that really doesn’t work with my Little feelings.  Plus being ignored by my partner hurts my adult-relationship feelings too.”  

“Jane, I have a hard time telling when you’re being ‘bratty’ for punishment and when you’re just having a grown-up bad day.  I’m committed to training and punishment, but I don’t want to erase your genuine feelings of discomfort or unhappiness.  I’ll be happy to train and punish you regardless, would that work for you?  Otherwise when we’re done with this conversation I’m going to put you over my lap and we’ll have a training session about how you can be clearer about the differences.  Would that work for you?”

(Note: If you usually call each other “Daddy” or “Baby” then using a given name is a very handy meta-talk/safeword.)