“I’m a Sub” ≠ “I want to Submit right now.”

“I’m a Sub” ≠ “I want to Submit to you.

Let’s put this in everyday terms.  If someone says “I’m looking for a roommate” you don’t say “I’m moving in, give me a key,” do you?  No, you say “Oh cool, I’m looking for a place to stay.  Are you already interviewing other people?  Do you have someone in mind?  If not then would you like to get together and see if we’d be a good fit?”

If someone posts a help-wanted ad you don’t walk in and say “start paying me, I’m going to start doing this my way,” do we?  No, we don’t because being escorted out by security is never as much fun as it looks on TV.

And telling a vanilla person “Hey, you’re vanilla so we’re dating now” would get you… how far?

So if someone says “I’m a Sub” what do you think you should say?

I still hate that whole “Submission is a gift” thing – just ask all the Subs who can’t find a good Dom how that’s working for them.  Hiring someone isn’t a “gift.”  Letting someone move into your spare bedroom isn’t a gift.  And if someone vanilla told you that dating them was a gift you’d barf in the nearest potted plant.

But Submitting is a choice.  It’s an active selection.  A Sub isn’t just some empty parking spot waiting for a Dom to casually put his blinkers on and back in.  There’s already somebody there, mate.  It’s up to them to decide if there’s room for two.