A PM from a Follower, abstracted in the interests of privacy …

“When you describe things like the kind of wallop a cane packs, for instance, you usually get it right in your captions. Is this from having girls tell you what it’s like?”

That’s one way, yes. If I introduce a girl to a new impact-play implement, I always do a debrief after to get her impressions etc. One can learn a lot just by saying “Tell me what it was like,” and then shutting the hell up and listening.

The other way is, I’ve never used an implement that I haven’t first tested on myself. Settle down, y’all, I’m not a closet switch! But I figure if I’m going to use something on someone, I ought to have some first-hand knowledge of what the hell it feels like. I do this test only once, the first time I bring a new implement into my arsenal. One stroke only, but I go full-on, to see what a “10″ with that implement feels like. I can still remember doing that test with a rattan cane, many moons ago. One stroke, on my inner thigh. Holy fucking shit!! All I could think was “How the actual fuck can anyone take 10 or 20 of those???” Masochists, ya gotta love ‘em. :)

Yes!  This!  My first “real” job, where I got a regular paycheck instead of, like, collecting for my paper route or painting houses, was with a fairly disreputable wheeler-dealer who opened one of the first pizza delivery places in my home town.  He was your classic “boss,” did everything but chomp on unlit cigars.  

He wasn’t what I’d call an honest businessman at all but he did have one rule I really appreciated.  And learned from: never ask a subordinate to do something you won’t do yourself.

So when he opened the store he made a point of showing us pretty much everything from making dough to scrubbing out the toilets.  Once.

But once was enough.

Because it wasn’t just that he was showing us how.  He was showing us he knew what he was asking us to do.

Like I say, not a good boss or businessman, and I’ve had to unlearn a lot of things I learned from him that are actually really bad, dumb, or incorrect.

But that one stuck.  And it’s just as important for [tops] as it is for bosses.