It sucks when people find out I’m a sub and suddenly think I’m a slut and asking for it from everyone..

That last paragraph!!!  In fact, I’m going to quote it again!

lovemysub:

It does suck, because they are fundamentally misunderstanding what a submissive is. They think a submissive is someone who is so desperate for cock that they will bow down and worship anything with a “Y” chromosome.

The truth that they will never understand is this: most submissives are selective as hell. See, they look for strength. Not just average strength, but the kind of strength that is so above and beyond most people that they, the submissive, can put their lives in the hands of that strength and feel confident. The kind of strength that is capable of being responsible for not only their own life, but the life of their submissive as well.

I love hearing belovedsangi’s stories of people who tried to dom her in the years that we were apart. She just laughed in their faces when they tried to take control. She giggled when they tried to give her a Dom stare. Sangi is stronger than anyone else I have ever met, without exception. The idea that she is some weak-willed cock-starving bimbo simply because she is submissive is laughable.

And @danipup, meanwhile… the idea that she’s “desperate for cock” or whatever else is hilarious. It took two solid years of friendship and trust before we both realized that we had sexual and romantic feelings for one another. Two years of getting to know one another as human beings. Two years of late night talks, of long in-person visits, of developing an understanding of one another before there was more than a quick hug between us. And you talk about strong? This woman endured things most of us cannot imagine and heartache on a scale that I hope I never experience. And she came back. She rescued herself. She found a way to love life despite everything she had been through. She climbed her way, little by little, out of a pit of misery, and she smiled. It doesn’t get much more badass than that.

That’s just it. Submissives are crazy strong. The amount of strength and willpower required to fully trust your well-being to someone else is more than most people can fathom. So of course, someone with that kind of strength is going to be selective.

And submissives, especially those of you who are new to this world, I’ll tell you this: if someone expects you to be a slut for everyone, they aren’t a dom. They are nothing more than a random asshat. If someone expects you to bow down to them when you first meet them because they said so, they are no more a dominant than I am a fairy princess. Don’t ever waste a second worrying about the opinions of these people. You will know a real dom when you meet them, because they won’t have to tell you that they are a dominant.

if someone expects you to be a slut for everyone, they aren’t a dom. They are nothing more than a random asshat. If someone expects you to bow down to them when you first meet them because they said so, they are no more a dominant than I am a fairy princess. Don’t ever waste a second worrying about the opinions of these people. You will know a real dom when you meet them, because they won’t have to tell you that they are a dominant.
@lovemysub

OMG!  It’s like… back in the day a lot of people assumed that if a man was gay he’d suck anybody’s dick.  And if a woman slept with anyone outside of marriage then she’d fuck  anybody  everybody!  Activists have had relative success clawing back those notions.

But too many people still assume if you’re a Sub you’ll submit to anybody!

People ought to know better but they notions persist.

I’m going to propose that a lot of folks who make these claims aren’t actually clueless, insensitive, or rude.  They’re not “newbies.”  They’re opportunists who see a low-effort chance to get their dicks wet.

“Oh, you’re gay?  Suck my dick?  Oh, you’re not a virgin?  Fuck me.  Oh, you’re a Sub?  Face down, ass up!”  

Definitely. Not. Doms!