Him: *slaps me*
Me: *gets wet*
Him: *forces his dick down my throat*
Me: *moans*
Him: *makes me bleed*
Me: *begs for more*
Him: *tickles me*
Me: *says safeword*
If you’re not into kink, or if you’re just new to it, or (especially) if you’ve only had bad experiences with it, or if you’re not into kink and you’ve only had bad experiences with regular old vanilla sex then…
This is pretty fucking important!!!
Safewords are an alternative way of saying “no.” And no matter how you agree to say it, no always fucking means no!
I’ll just put it out there that while, yes, safewords have a very specific meaning in BDSM circumstances where both partners can go very, very deep into subspace and/or “superspace” and one of them realizes they need to stop.
But!
Safewords have a very specific meaning when that’s not going on too. It doesn’t have to mean “pull the plug and break out the blankets, water bottles, and maybe ice packs. It can, but it doesn’t have to.
Sometimes it can just mean “let’s stop for a minute, tickling is a limit for me, can you stick to slapping?”
Again, if you’re not into BDSM it might sound funny or odd that being slapped would be a turn on but tickling would be off limits. But the whole fucking point of good sex, kinky or otherwise, is that everybody gets what they want, with the result that everybody feels satisfied. And (more important than anything) they want to do it again!
Oh, and for the record? Even if you’re as vanilla as Mother Theresa and you don’t like being tickled or teased? That’s still a hard “no” then, however you choose to say it.
No always means no so that yes can mean oh hell yes!
