“What did she expect” says far more about you than her…

xxxamorexxx:

Do people have any goddamn idea how much more “what did she expect” says about them than about who they’re talking about?

Scolding victims means you agree with the old-school feminists that violent sexual assault isn’t about sex, it’s about violence.  It means the old-school feminists were right that you believe violent sexual assault is a useful tool for social control of women.  It means you believe violent sexual assault is a good form of punishment for trivial social transgressions.

Putting it in the kind of right-wing “law n’ order” terms conservatives are always bandying about, scolding victims = mollycoddling criminals.  it means privileging criminals over their victims.

I sincerely doubt that anyone reading this has ever said “what did she expect to happen.”  I’m offering this as an invitation to fry the ears off anyone you hear say shit like this, in terms that might percolate through the useless fleshy growth between their shoulders.

Ugh!

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