Hi!I just was wondering, im quite a new when it comes to sex(i havent given/recieved a oral, and i barely tried anal aline) but im still really interested in being dominated and such. Would you take things slow at first? Any advice for a newbie girl?

itsallprimal:

A good Dominant should always take things slow with a submissive. respecting limits and letting each one get comfortable with another. As time goes on and you become more comfortable in your play and dynamic then you ca explore more and being pushing the boundaries of desires. 

No matter how new you are to the lifestyle, the first rule is take it slow! 

~Primal

Just going to put it out there that there are two kinds of Doms: those who are only in it for themselves, and Doms.

A doodledom is likely going to look at all the things you haven’t done and rush to run through all of them, maybe so they can be “your first.”

A Dom is more likely going to see it as an opportunity to get to know you, learn your interests, mesh them with his, and he’s going to see your experience level as an opportunity to take months and months to guide you through All the Things, where some will appear to you as rewards and others as challenges and still others as a chance for you to really learn and stand up for your limits and boundaries.

The point is that D/S isn’t so much about what you do as how you do it!  (For instance the actual physical sex in many deeply D/S relationships is often surprisingly vanilla.)

So if I was handing out advice I’d say look for someone who wants to dominate you and not simply “break in a new girl.”  If you posted the same thing the anon said to @itsallprimal on one of the kink-friendlier dating or matching sites you’d likely get lots of overtures… and therefore lots of possible Doms to choose from.  And you do get to choose.  

Oh, last piece of advice: a good Dom will understand and appreciate that you really do get to choose him.  And he’ll get that you can change your mind if he’s not right for you.  A doodledom will just think he’s entitled to you, often from the word go.

Best of luck to the anon!

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