Offensive Content

yessiraustralia-again:

Guns aren’t offensive

Smoking isn’t offensive

Extreme political views aren’t offensive

Drug use isn’t offensive

Gang promotion isn’t offensive

Assholes showing off obscene wealth advocating crime isn’t offensive.

You want to know what’s offensive?

Nipples, that’s what!

According to Tumblr anyway.

Oh, and not all nipples of course.  Only “female-presenting” nipples.  

Thing is I like your nipples!  They’re cute!  Sexy.  Eye catching.  They feel nice.  They make me genuinely happy.

Unlike guns, smoking, extremists, drug and alcohol abuse, gangs, and conspicuous consumption, which make most people feel unhappy.  (Even the gun, smoking, drugs, and wealth lovers, every one of whom is unhappy because they can never, ever get enough of that shit.)

Nipples though?   Because like Good Omens’ Sergeant Shadwell I really only need your two to be happy.  And all the rest of you too, pumpkin.

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