By Thomas Oldenough | October 3, 2019 | Comments Off on its fuckingdisturbing that you want to treat women like children. immaturity is not sexy and you are vile for thinking so
Thank you for your comment. You feel I treat adult women as if they were children. It’s your position that immaturity is vile and that if I think it’s sexy I’m a vile person. Does that sound right?
Technically I want to treat competent, capable adult kinky partners the way they enjoy being treated during kinky activities. But if you don’t see the distinction it could certainly be vile and disgusting. I agree completely that if I didn’t see the difference either then I really would be a vile person!
It would be even worse if I wanted to treat all women (or men, actually) like children, wouldn’t it? And there are plenty of people in the world who think exactly that way. One of the tough things about having kinks is that they tend to be pretty transgressive, and very often reflect actions or behaviors that when sincerely believed and especially when advocated as social, legal, or religious are pretty fucking disturbing.
Luckily for all of us I’m not interested in child partners (eww), or adult partners who are immature (yikes), nor do I think all prospective partners are or should be child-like.
Also luckily the psychologists, artists, business owners, college students, emergency responders, single parents, athletes, and other adults who’ve flirted with or dated me since I started this Cg/L or D/Lg Daddy blog would be less than impressed if they thought I imagined were childlike or immature. Nor would they be impressed with anyone who leveled that accusation against them… as you’ll likely discover if you drop similar accusations in their inboxes.
I don’t know if you feel reassured by my answer but please believe me when I say I appreciate your concern. Best of luck in your own relationships, kinky or otherwise.
By Thomas Oldenough | August 21, 2019 | Comments Off on I’m a gay male who just came across your blog, and oh boy have I came. Reading what you write, I get hot and flustered because the idea of being someone’s boy (even girl) is an absolute turn on. Lately, I’ve begun to capture my own femininity and understand its roots, in spite of working through the burdensome guilt and shame. Have others in their footsteps like me come/written to you before as well? Thanks.
Thank you for your kind words! I’ve never had a gay man send a serious ask but I’m glad you checked in. I haven’t mentioned it for maybe too long, but while I always use the shorthand D/Lg because I’m a hetero Daddy, there’s a whole universe of possibilities under the general heading of Cg/L (Caregiver/Little.) And that’s really important because being an adult Little is a kink, not an age or gender or sex or orientation.
Tumblr’s made it so much harder to search for kinks, but before the big stink last December it was pretty easy to find D/Lb (regular Daddies) and DD/Lb (Daddy Dom) blogs and posts. And M/Lg, M/Lb, and all the poly, trans, non-binary, and even asexual/non-sexual Cg/L.
I’m sorry I didn’t keep track back when track could be kept. I’d be happy to send you links. But since I was a bit of an entitled pooter I’m going to have to ask my followers if they know of any great blogs or other gay and pan Daddy or Lb bloggers. And while I usually don’t encourage it, in this case It’s ok for followers who have D/Lg and other Cg/L blogs to self-promote too. (Positive and supportive resources only though, please. It’s ok if you just reblog industrial porn but it’s not very helpful when someone’s trying to explore and discover newfound kinks.)
Thank you so much for asking. I was so, so happy when I discovered my own Daddy kink. Going to wish you lots and lots of luck exploring your Little kink too.
Comments Off on I’m a gay male who just came across your blog, and oh boy have I came. Reading what you write, I get hot and flustered because the idea of being someone’s boy (even girl) is an absolute turn on. Lately, I’ve begun to capture my own femininity and understand its roots, in spite of working through the burdensome guilt and shame. Have others in their footsteps like me come/written to you before as well? Thanks.
By Thomas Oldenough | December 20, 2018 | Comments Off on I’m ill and I keep slipping into little space, and getting overwhelmed. I don’t like feeling yucky! Any advice to help me kick this cold in the butt and maintain my small-selves sanity?
It’s ok for a Little to have ginger ale when they’re sick. It’s ok for a Little who’s feeling sickie to lie in bed and watch all their favorite kid shows on Netflix or Hulu, or rent them on Amazon. Or see if they’re on YouTube. At least three years “younger” than your usual regressing age. It’s ok to lie in bed and rock side to side and say”I don’t want to be sick, make it better,” even if there’s no one to say it to. And it’s ok for a sick Little to use a whole sheet or just a pillowcase as a hankie to blow their nose in.
And if you can build up a little cushion for adult time you can run out and get some chicken soup, some DayQuil or else plain Tylenol (not both) or if you can find it get some Chinese yin chaio herbs (which work great, for real, in most Chinese groceries and many western herb shops.)
Then sleep lots, drink lots of fluids, and only be responsible about things you really must till you feel better.
—-
So. That’s the truth, but it’s not the answer, is it? No, because the answer is I’m so sorry you’re sick! We both wish you weren’t sick don’t we?
Oh, pumpkin, if you weren’t sick you could run and jump and play and do fun grownup things like work and get ready for Christmas, couldn’t you?
But you do have a cold, don’t you?
You’ll feel mostly better in about a week. If you celebrate Christmas it won’t be ruined but you’ll need to ask for a little help from your caregiver and maybe your friends and your family. And if you do get help remember to say please and thank you, ok?
Comments Off on I’m ill and I keep slipping into little space, and getting overwhelmed. I don’t like feeling yucky! Any advice to help me kick this cold in the butt and maintain my small-selves sanity?
By Thomas Oldenough | November 5, 2018 | Comments Off on Howdy good sir! Something has irked me a tad and I’d like a second(or 12 second) opinion/s! Lately I’m seeing a lot of Ddlg posts tagged as sfw and ???? If I was at work and someone popped their merry head over my shoulder and saw someome with a pacifier in their mouth, or any of the billion other things that makes a little, a little. I’m 99% sure they’d do the vanilla “gross what the heck” crap. Is it me or is there a difference between like, sfw and safe space? TIA!
Yeah, they shouldn’t do that. One of the foundations of D/s is “consent,” and that includes the consent of random people who might stumble across a DDlg blog. By tagging our blogs NSFW, we are allowing people to make an informed judgment about whether they want to be exposed to our content or not. Some bloggers have a hard time grasping the fact that, to most vanillas, even things way over on the DDlg end of the spectrum are still seen as “perverted.”
According to his biographers, the Russian czar Peter the Great loved torturing people. Personally! (He was nothing if not a technology do-it-yourselfer.)
So one day he’s torturing some guy and the guy’s just not cracking. Like the Black Knight in Monthy Python! So Peter gets all curious and collegial and asks the guy what going on. And the guys say “Oh, I’m in a torture society. We get together and torture each other. It’s fun. You’re just not very good. Try sticking a red-hot coal in my ear – now that’ll hurt!”
There’s exactly zero evidence that this torture society was a kinky society. And Russians of the day being Russians of the day, both the czar and his prisoner would likely have been shocked and offended by the very suggestion.
I mention this because…
Not all Littles and their Caregivers are sexual Littles or Caregivers. And, man, those guys get SO FRICKIN OFFENDED when you link to them, mix with them, or otherwise accuse them of any such thing.
You’ll surely encounter D/S partners who feel the same way, by the way. Domestic discipline can be quite severe in, say, fundamentalist religious communities. But part of the discipline may include ice-water baths and mutual flagellation to avoid having sexual thoughts at all!
Don’t get me wrong. Some D/Lg types are seriously kinky while in Littlespace. Others have regular vanilla or sometimes even kinky sex lives… but not at all while in Littlespace. And some are Ace as hell. They’re all into Cg/L for the regression part, not sex.
Just going to add that nonsexual Cg/L types especially hate being mixed up with DD/Lg, a form of D/S that somewhat overlaps D/Lg and Cg/L but isn’t really either.
It’s only a little confusing once you think back not just to Peter the Great and his captive (who, yeah, Peter thanked and then executed with no hard feelings.) Or even just something as simple as D/Lg or D/S people who don’t do punishment or S&M.
When you run into sfw Littles or Caregivers do what I do. Give them a little respect. Try not to repost them. When you make a mistake apologize and delete any reposts that bother them. Block them if you’re really worried about crossreferencing them – they’re unlikely to mind.
Comments Off on Howdy good sir! Something has irked me a tad and I’d like a second(or 12 second) opinion/s! Lately I’m seeing a lot of Ddlg posts tagged as sfw and ???? If I was at work and someone popped their merry head over my shoulder and saw someome with a pacifier in their mouth, or any of the billion other things that makes a little, a little. I’m 99% sure they’d do the vanilla “gross what the heck” crap. Is it me or is there a difference between like, sfw and safe space? TIA!
By Thomas Oldenough | October 13, 2018 | Comments Off on Is the DD/lg or whatever the male/male version of that would be only sexual? Can it be romantic or maybe even platonic? I’m ace and have realized my Little/pet-ness and I’m worried I’d only find a daddy/master who thinks sex is a guaranteed. Sorry for bugging you.
No matter the gender or sexuality of the Caregiver that you are looking for, there will always be a variety of people and what they are looking for. There are plenty of heterosexual male Doms and Caregivers that are interested in only the sexual aspect of DD/lg and believe that sex should be an established part of the relationship. However, there are also plenty of heterosexual male Caregivers that are only interested in the Caregiving parts of DD/lg, that are perfectly fine with having a nonsexual relationship with their Little. I’m only using this as an example to establish a basic point, which is…
This is also going to apply for Caregivers and Littles in any mix of genders and sexualities. None of the dynamics can be grouped in one broad sweep as “just wanting sex” or “no sex at all ever”. Its a spectrum, and you just have to find what works for you. Be patient and never settle for less than you deserve.
Good luck.
It’s super important to remember… well… a bunch of things about D/Lg, Cg/L and other caregiver/follower relationships
Not all Caregivers or Littles are sexual
Not all Littles age women
Not all Daddies are men
Not everyone in Cg/L is straight
Age differences aren’t necessary
Some people are very sexual… but not when they’re in Little ore Caregiver space
Comments Off on Is the DD/lg or whatever the male/male version of that would be only sexual? Can it be romantic or maybe even platonic? I’m ace and have realized my Little/pet-ness and I’m worried I’d only find a daddy/master who thinks sex is a guaranteed. Sorry for bugging you.
